As a follow up on our last blog post "Where is the line?" here are few signs if you are being abused according to "The House of Ruth"

• "You are frightened by your partner’s temper
• You are afraid to disagree with your partner
• You have been hit, kicked, or shoved by your partner
• You do not see friends or family because of your partner’s jealousy
• You have been forced to have sex or have been afraid to say no to sex
• You have been forced to explain everything that you do, every place that you go and every person that you see to avoid your partner’s temper
• You believe that you cannot live without your partner or that you cannot get enough of your partner
• You believe that marriage will change your partner
• Your partner makes you feel worse about yourself
• You have fewer and fewer happy times together, and more and more of your time is spent on apologies, promises, anger, guilt and fear"

First and foremost, NEVER let anyone make you feel worse about yourself whether it be a friend, co-worker and especially your partner.If your partner has ever made you doubt your self-worth this could be the ultimate warning sign. Never let anyone decide your self-worth other than you and let me tell you... you are AMAZING!

When I first started getting involved with relationship violence, I often wondered, "Where exactly is the line?" I researched further and found several answers but all were rather indirect. As I further my journey with ending relationship violence, I know understand that answer just a little bit more and here is my own:

That start of a dangerous relationship begins with simple signs such as verbal abuse (there are other warning signs like control and bullying). Whenever you feel less of yourself, question your self worth, and do not feel equal to your partner that is when a relationship is becoming dangerous. Never let your partner feel any of these ways because NO woman deserves to ever feel like this. The line should defiantly never be crossed but no one should ever come close! From stories and research I know, most men don't immediately become abusive they gradually become more controlling and abusive. Recognize these signs before the line is crossed!!